What Things Will You Not Like In Your Jazz?

[JSngry]

You first.

I 'd not want to been seen as "setting the tone"'...but ok....blazers. No blazers in my jazz, please.

Feel free to continue, as there are no wrong answers.

[sidewinder]

No Simmons Drums.

[Stefan Wood]

Cow bells. And chest hair.

Edited October 16, 2012 by Stefan Wood

[Head Man]

Maraccas

[jazzbo]

Pat Metheny guitar sounds, especially if you're not Pat.

[robertoart]

Scandinavian Winters.

[David Ayers]

Piano. Sorry. Oh and Paul Chambers. Sorry again.

Jimmy Garrison solos are fine though. Oh wait - no they're not.

Sorry.

[AllenLowe]

musicians.

[David Ayers]

musicians.

So your ideal band is Brian Eno and Sid Vicious? Mine too.

I bought a Fender bass once off someone and went round to his house. He was painting canvases - a lot of them. I asked him why was he selling it, had he lost interest in music. He said music was fine but he couldn't stand musicians so he was doing painting instead.

[TedR]

Gumbo

[WD45]

Squeaky hi-hat setups.

[Joe]

Pat Metheny guitar sounds, especially if you're not Pat.

Agreed 100%.

Also, "jazz" (yes, the kind in quotation marks).

[John Tapscott]

Fade-outs.

[jlhoots]

Fade-outs.

you beat me to it.

[7/4]

Cheese.

[BeBop]

Vocals. Yeah, a pretty broad condemnation of a major element of what many consider jazz. But I just can't "do" vocals, Mr. 5X5, Eddie Jefferson and a few others excepted.

[Dave James]

[A Lark Ascending]

"Art"

[Larry Kart]

Soprano saxophones (with rare exceptions)

[mjazzg]

Alternate takes (with rare exceptions)

[BruceH]

Flute.

[A Lark Ascending]

Drum machines and polyphonic synths that fill in all the gaps.

Mouth organ.

Guitars put through polyphonic synths to make them sound like a mouth organ (yes, Pat, I mean you!)

Edited October 16, 2012 by A Lark Ascending

[Shawn]

Pretending no songs exist outside "The Great American Songbook".

[Pete C]

Maraccas

You'll miss out on a lot of great Machito recordings, then.

Soprano saxophones (with rare exceptions)

Bechet & Lacy? But yeah, after Trane it seemed that every tenor player felt he HAD to take up soprano, but without developing an instrument-specific approach, IMO. I can do without Shepp & Pharoah on soprano, for instance.

I have no instrument I'd rule out, though harpsichord and celesta are hard sells. Can't stand the sound of Kellaway's harpsichord on Ben's See You at the Fair.

I wouldn't care if Frank Wess and James Moody had never played flute, but jazz would be a poorer place if Rahsaan, Dolphy, Sam Rivers and a few others never did. And Nicole Mitchell & James Newton.

Edited October 16, 2012 by Pete C

[JSngry]

Casual slacks with high-dollar dress shoes.