Joe G Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 Yes, she will sap your strength with wretched singing, in order to paralyze you into darkness and take you into her forboding lair whereupon she will make evil love to you. ...and thus, bear my goth-child. Quote
patricia Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 And each one more handsome than the one before. Quote
Dmitry Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 Vigor Wiggle needs to think of a better name. Where do you actually buy the pirate shirts? Is there a pirate shirt store? Quote
Big Al Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 For those of you who were wondering about that latest Styx solo project.... Quote
Big Al Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 Mama was right: your face WILL freeze if you keep looking like that! Quote
couw Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 He was glad he had brought his laser goggles. It had been a strenuous day. Using the ephemeral energies of lightning, he had succeeded in creating his dream princess. The first attempt misfired when the Boris Karloff like-a-look stepped out of the smokey container; his second attempt came closer to the envisaged result: the skirt was there, but the goatee definitely put him off. Although he did wish the third attempt had turned out better he was happy nonetheless. Pity though that his trusty sidekicks were turned into stone gargoyles in the process. Quote
Big Al Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 (edited) Boris Karloff like-a-look Pity though that his trusty sidekicks were turned into stone gargoyles in the process. ...and as a result, changing their sound from a fifth-rate Percy Faith tribute band to a fifth-rate Marilyn Manson tribute band. Edited December 18, 2003 by Big Al Quote
Big Al Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 I just spent the last hour at that RRC BBS. That is some funny off-the-wall shtuff. Just goes to show that each BBS, in its own strange way, is truly a community. Just what kind of community it is, I don't know..... -_- Quote
Joe G Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 Saw this one yesterday and just had to go back for it: Hellfire keeps your chest hair nicely trimmed, apparently. Quote
Bright Moments Posted December 18, 2003 Report Posted December 18, 2003 Desperately sucking in his cheeks, Jeremy realized he would need the aid of a black hole or some sort of inter-dimensional vortex to suck everything in. the first "fat boys" tribute band. Quote
tonym Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Lookin' Good Mr. Rubber Legs. This site is hilarious. Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Windsor County JVS - Auto Mechanics - Class of 1983 Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 The only things missing on "Phishy" are the wiggly stink lines. Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 "I made a special trip to Home Depot for this chain so I'll be posing up front!" Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 These guys are probably a corny neo-swing band, but who's the guy in the front? MC Way Out Cat? Quote
couw Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 They finally finished their calculations after night upon night of sleep deprivation. They had managed to show conclusively that their new machine was capable not only of time travel, but would as a welcome side effect cure their personality problems as well, effectively preventing squinting eyes when smiling for the pic, canceling dropping necks and hairdos that don't fit the smirk, and even curing what must seem irreperable irregularly spaced teeth. Theirs was the true happiness of the moment; barely ten seconds later Andy dropped the drawing board, erasing crucial portions of their formulas. Their machine would have cured his clumsiness too... Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 From that site: So you're gonna be on Cribs... We've got a few pointers to make your CRIBS taping the best it can be! By CKOne 1. You don't eat, sleep or have sex, you "Get your eat/sleep/fuck on." 2. Whenever possible, end sentences with "at". Ex: "Dis where I make my babies at." 3. It's not a "room". It's an "area". Ex: "Dis here the pool area." or "Here go the kitchen area." 4. Cars & Trucks = Rides. Never call your ride a car. 5. 20's aren't denominations of currency, they are the rims on your ride. They must be blinged out. (See #6) 6. Things are not shiny. They are blinged out. 7. Your ride needs at least one Playstation and DVD player integrated into a seat back, visor, dashboard or all of the above. 8. They are not friends. They are dawgz. 9. On the day of taping, you must have a minimum of 8 to 10 dawgz kickin' it in your pool, studio and theater areas. 10. One does not relax. One cheelz. 11. When you are kickin it, you are not playing soccer or angry at the dog, you are having a few friends over for drinks. 12. Consider trading a Lexy for a pit bull, Rottweiler or other menacing dog. 13. Tattoos are a must. When choosing a tattoo, they must evoke memories of someone you haven't seen in a great while like a dawg you lost or one of your children. 14. Remember, the only woman worthy of respect is your "Moms". All other women are hoochies and hos. 15. Build a sunken platinum basketball jersey humidor area. 16. During taping, try not to shoot any white chauffeurs. If you happen to shoot a white chauffeur, try to make your visitors accessories after the fact. 17. The proper "Crib Touring Stance" is to hold your right fist in your left hand and place both over your sternum. Hold your lips inside your mouth to evoke a placid demeanor. 18. You may own any or all existing video game systems other than a Nintendo, which is for beeyotches and kids. However, you may only own NFL or NBA themed video games. (No one has ever said "This is where I get my flight simulation on.") 19. If possible, breed or buy a chrome Rottweiler. 20. Fish tanks may only house piranhas or sharks (a.k.a. "The Rottweiler and Domerman of the Sea") 21. Remove all books, computers and cats from the residence prior to taping. (No one has ever said "This is where I get my read on." or "Dis where my cat gets it's poop on.") 22. Self portraits aren't only for corporate executives and historical figures! Remember, the bigger the portrait, the more respect it commands! 23. Two words: Black Lacquer 24. Keep the table in the formal dining area set at all times with gold, chrome and/or diamond flatware. 25. Make sure you have at least two large rooms/automobiles that "You ain't even go in/drove ever." 26. Bet on everything with your dawgz. Always win. 27. A pile of credit cards is not impressive. CASH ONLY! 28. When the MTV crew is leaving, be as rude as possible. Ex: "Now you've seen the crib, you best get to steppin." 29. Most importantly, do not get too attached to any of this. You will not have it in five years. Quote
Jim Alfredson Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 And finally, one for my brother Joe... "This next jam goes out to my hero and mentor, Aldo Nova!" Quote
Joe G Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Excellent! That cribs list is very astute! Bill Vits needs to see that -- we've laughed about that stuff before. Aldo Nova: Life is just a fantasy, can you live this fantasy life. Quote
JSngry Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Nice carpet, sunken den, encyclopedias, & entertainment center, Rebel Boy. Quote
Joe G Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Is that a cat bed just off to the side of the entertainment center? And I think I see a Jennifer Aniston movie on the shelf... Quote
Big Al Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 And I think I see a Jennifer Aniston movie on the shelf... It is: Picture Perfect Quote
JSngry Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 I bet his mom still makes his bed for him. Quote
Alexander Posted December 19, 2003 Report Posted December 19, 2003 Hey, hey, We're the Comb-overs! Quote
_forumlogo.png.a607ef20a6e0c299ab2aa6443aa1f32e.png)
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.