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A DEEP OLIVE BRANCH TO CHRISTIERN


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Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

My capsule bio reads like this:

Parents who adored each other, raised four kids together and divorced, because of my beloved [no sarcasm intended] dad's alcoholism. They are both dead now, but saw each other daily, even after the divorce.

Educated in private Catholic schools, moving on to a degree in English Lit. and a minor in art, sold switchboards for the telephone co. for 22 years finally working as a still life photographer for various dept. stores and manufacturers.

Married at 23, raised two daughters, one, now married with a little boy, with a degree in Mechanical Engineering and the other entering the local U. this fall, intending to study Library Science.

Currently single, and doing OK, though not rich or even moderately well-off, still friends with my ex. The latest move cut the legs off my contacts, but I do occasional free-lance photography, and have THREE day jobs and did not ask for any help at all from my ex nor did I expect any.

Going to one of my jobs now..................

Maybe I'll make out OK, maybe not.

Still no answer to the Orgasm question.

I had a chickie once who was incapable of climaxing.

NEVER AGAIN!! (No matter how good looking they are...that's asking for some big time trouble)

DEEP

Posted (edited)

My capsule bio reads like this:

Parents who adored each other, raised four kids together and divorced, because of my beloved [no sarcasm intended] dad's alcoholism.  They are both dead now, but saw each other daily, even after the divorce.

Educated in private Catholic schools, moving on to a degree in English Lit. and a minor in art, sold switchboards for the telephone co. for 22 years finally working as a still life photographer for various dept. stores and manufacturers.

Married at 23, raised two daughters, one, now married with a little boy, with a degree in Mechanical Engineering and the other entering the local U. this fall, intending to study Library Science. 

Currently single, and doing OK, though not rich or even moderately well-off, still friends with my ex.  The latest move cut the legs off my contacts, but I do occasional free-lance photography, and have THREE day jobs and did not ask for any help at all from my ex nor did I expect any.

Going to one of my jobs now..................

Maybe I'll make out OK, maybe not.

Still no answer to the Orgasm question.

I had a chickie once who was incapable of climaxing.

NEVER AGAIN!! (No matter how good looking they are...that's asking for some big time trouble)

DEEP

No I didn't answer your question, but there are only two reasons for the incapability you mentioned.

One is a clumsy, ignorant lover and the other is a physical dysfuntional woman. The first reason is far more likely that the second.

So, to answer your question, everything is in working order. As for the other part of the question, NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.

Edited by patricia
Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

So, to answer your question, everything is in working order. As for the other part of the question, NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.

Patty,

That's all well and good and though it may be true that it's none of my "damn business" be advised that I refuse to fuck you until you tell me when the last time it was that you had an orgasm with a PARTNER!!

Until such time that you reveal that information it will just have to be you and your vibrator.

Sorry, but that is playin' the game by MY rules and that's the only way we're gonna play...DIG??

DEEP

Posted (edited)

My capsule bio reads like this:

Parents who adored each other, raised four kids together and divorced, because of my beloved [no sarcasm intended] dad's alcoholism.  They are both dead now, but saw each other daily, even after the divorce.

Educated in private Catholic schools, moving on to a degree in English Lit. and a minor in art, sold switchboards for the telephone co. for 22 years finally working as a still life photographer for various dept. stores and manufacturers.

Married at 23, raised two daughters, one, now married with a little boy, with a degree in Mechanical Engineering and the other entering the local U. this fall, intending to study Library Science. 

Currently single, and doing OK, though not rich or even moderately well-off, still friends with my ex.  The latest move cut the legs off my contacts, but I do occasional free-lance photography, and have THREE day jobs and did not ask for any help at all from my ex nor did I expect any.

Going to one of my jobs now..................

Maybe I'll make out OK, maybe not.

I'm sure you'll make out, Patty. You've got a lot of grit and intelligence; and you're a good sport.

DEEP seems to imagine he's got the inside track in getting you, but it seems that he's falling behind THE GROPE, who is employing a more cerebral and gentlemanly approach.

That part about being a clumsy and ignorant lover...ouch! ;)

Edited by connoisseur series500
Posted

So, to answer your question, everything is in working order.  As for the other part of the question, NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.

Patty,

That's all well and good and though it may be true that it's none of my "damn business" be advised that I refuse to fuck you until you tell me when the last time it was that you had an orgasm with a PARTNER!!

Until such time that you reveal that information it will just have to be you and your vibrator.

Sorry, but that is playin' the game by MY rules and that's the only way we're gonna play...DIG??

DEEP

I am not in the least bit interested in either posting a naked picture of myself on Organissimo or anywhere else.

As for your other question, as I say, NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS. I'm nothing if not discreet and you know me better than to even ask.

As to your statement that you might "choose" me, don't hold your breath, not that I'm not just flattered and complimented and just damn tickled pick that you would even consider it. Who wouldn't be??

Thank you, but pass.

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

In short, DEEP, maybe your methods only work on HOOKERS and Patty ....

Conn (a linguist),

I have as one of my DEEP creeds the following:

Let it NEVER be said I didn't get laid because I FORGOT to ask.

Believe me, I've done OK with my approach. The words "I LOVE YOU" roll very trippingly off my tongue.

One of the ways to totally cop the chickie's wig is..... right after you've dropped a full load in her and your leaving it in to SOAK, you use both hands on the bitch's hair and look her straight in the eyes.. spout as sincerely as possible, "God Damn, I NEVER thought I would say this but....(hesitate and sigh).....I Love YOU (try to quell up a tear at that very moment)...you got you a humble hand maiden for as long as you want one.

DEEP

Posted (edited)

One of the ways to totally cop the chickie's wig is..... right after you've dropped a full load in her and your leaving it in to SOAK, you use both hands on the bitch's hair and look her straight in the eyes.. spout as sincerely as possible, "God Damn, I NEVER thought I would say this but....(hesitate and sigh).....I Love YOU (try to quell up a tear at that very moment)...you got you a humble hand maiden for as long as you want one.

DEEP

Lots of success with that, huh?

Edited by connoisseur series500
Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

Lots of success with that, huh? :P

You said it, I didn't.

DEEP

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

After spending nearly two and half hours reading this entire thread for the first time, I've reached one conclusion:

DEEP is one funny motherfucker!!!! :excited:

Underground(hog)agent(orange),

You must be new in these parts.

If you think I'm funny you are in a majority of one. I was not put on this earth to be liked NOR was I put here to be laughed at.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm.....

....DEEP

Posted (edited)

To each their own...you may be revolting to some, but fuck...this sure does beat the hell out of reading about U.S. Foreign Policy in Latin American during the Nixon Administration.

Continue...

Oh, oh, don't look now, but DEEP has hooked another one. :lol:

What's GROPE up to? :blink:

Edited by connoisseur series500
Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

MILT BERNHART "MOVED TO VERMONT" (What WHITE FOLK tell children when explaining the death of a relative i.e. "Uncle Miltie moved to Vermont, Virginia...he's in a better place now, dear.")

77 years old.

DEEP

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted (edited)

DON LEIGHT (trumpet player) "MOVED TO VERMONT". 80 YEARS OLD.

Not many of you will have heard of him but he was on the NYC scene for years. He had played with Buddy Rich's Band back in the 40's.

He had an up-tilted trumpet, not has tilted as Dizzy's, more like Bill Chases's horn. I worked with him at Roseland in the late 80's and early 90's. He was a very sweet cat.

DEEP

Edited by DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

So sad to hear about Milt Bernheart ..

Milt was on the very first "real " record date I ever played on and had written stuff for at

the old Radio Recorders asnnex in LA in the summer of 1960 .Here I was, sitting in a studio full of REAL pros for the first time in my 24 year old life and I was scared shitless! ..

I remember clearly the whole brass section ( because in those days you could see over the baffles ) Ray Triscari, Cappy Lewis, Stu Williamson , and Jules Chaiken were the trumpet guys , and Milt, Gil Falco , Tommy Pedersen and George Roberts were the bones ..lemme tell you , I was one scared pup for two days.. having to deal with both playing the kit and having written some of the charts, telling these guys what I wanted ..

I just recall, that Milt ( along with Ray Triscari ) were very nice to me, and very friendly on the breaks ..and I always remembered it.

RIP Milt ..I'll miss you

Posted

Aren't DEEP and Patty adorable? She so coy, he so straightforward--We need PICTURES of each, discreet or otherwise. This "cerebral gentleman" yields to a match of Titans!

BTW, UGA--I really admire Nixon for his willingness to take a hit for the team in Latin America.

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

Aren't DEEP and Patty adorable? She so coy, he so straightforward--We need PICTURES of each, discreet or otherwise. This "cerebral gentleman" yields to a match of Titans!

HEY, THE GROPER......STEP OFF, JUNIOR...STEP THE FUCK OFF.

I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN A POSTER IN MORE NEED OF A BASEBALL BAT THAN YOU.

You think you can jump in here after one week of posting and sort things out between me and Patty?? FUCKING FORGET IT !!

GO SELL YOUR SUPPOSITORIES SOMEPLACE ELSE...YOU'RE ON MY TURF HERE...DIG??

DEEP

Posted

Aren't DEEP and Patty adorable?  She so coy, he so straightforward--We need PICTURES of each, discreet or otherwise.  This "cerebral gentleman" yields to a match of Titans!

HEY, THE GROPER......STEP OFF, JUNIOR...STEP THE FUCK OFF.

:g

Some hard sledding ahead, GROPE.

Don't worry: it's not he who comes first or who is most aggressive, but he who loves most that gets the chickie.

Persevere...you can catch DEEP offguard some time when he's got his hands full in another hen coop.

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

BILLY MAY..."VERMONT" !!

DEEP

Guest DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted (edited)

Some hard sledding ahead, GROPE.

Don't worry:

Persevere...

THE GROPER,

SUGGESTION:

Stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson.

When you get home seclude yourself so you will not be disturbed. Change into comfortable clothing and sit yourself down in your comfortable chair.

Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it somewhere safe so that it will not become chipped or

broken. Take out the product literature and read it carefully. You will notice that

in small print there is a statement,

"Every rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson is personally tested."

AN EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY IS WAITING FOR YOU, THE GROPER !!

DEEP

Edited by DEEP (GET ME OUT OF MY SKULL)
Posted

GO SELL YOUR SUPPOSITORIES SOMEPLACE ELSE...YOU'RE ON MY TURF HERE...DIG??

DEEP

Actually this is my turf and I'm not too thrilled with what's been going down in this thread lately. Just because you've confined yourself to one thread doesn't mean you have a free pass.

This is a jazz bulletin board. Not a sexual exploits board, not a bragging rights board, not a rag-on-whoever-you-want board and definately not a board where each person has carte blanche to say whatever they want as long as they start their own topic.

"The Groper": why have you come here? 14 posts and none outside this thread. Do you actually want to discuss jazz or did you come here to talk dirty? There are lots of boards for that. Not mine.

DEEP, you know the rules and you know that I'm a pretty tolerant guy but this is my gig. I know you've quarantined yourself in here until the new software is released and the "ignore" feature is implemented, but you still have to conduct yourself like everyone else on this board. I'm not going to make seperate rooms for every member that doesn't want to play nice.

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