Digression thread: Coherence is overrated

[Uncle Skid]

I'm totally irritated with both of you guys... this thread is almost starting to make sense. Coherence is overrated.

Here's my irrelevant thoughts: I've heard two of Allen's CDs (New Tango '92 and A Modern Portrait of Louis Armstrong). They are both very good, and I'd bet that many of our board members would agree.

P.S. Doc Cheatham rules.

[Chuck Nessa]

How can a doc cheat ham?

[Uncle Skid]

How can a doc cheat ham?

That's easy: have Aldo Nova shoot Big Al's avatar with his rockin' guitar's laser beam. Duh!

(and Big Al has it coming for posting lyrics to Muskrat Love. )

[AllenLowe]

thank you for the compliment, Skid (if I may call you that) -

pardon my coherence on the last several posts -

I promise to stop taking my meds -

[AllenLowe]

one more coherent thought - somewhere I have a DAT of me and Doc playing Chinatown, recorded in my living room -

[Chuck Nessa]

I'd be interested in you guys playing "In My Living room" in Chinatown. I think it's a Hal McKusick tune.

[Uncle Skid]

thank you for the compliment, Skid (if I may call you that) -

pardon my coherence on the last several posts -

I promise to stop taking my meds -

Well, you can call me Skid, or Mark, or Skid Mark, just please don't confuse me with Aggie or Free For All. Those guys are weird.

But I'd probably just prefer Mark.

[Free For All]

Hey Skid...........STFU!

[Uncle Skid]

ok, i'll immeDIately stop the Coherence on this thread by maKing a post that doesn't make any sense!

[Free For All]

ok, i'll immeDIately stop the Coherence on this thread by maKing a post that doesn't make any sense!

Digression Is Coherence, Kimosabe!

[Aggie87]

ok, i'll immeDIately stop the Coherence on this thread by maKing a post that doesn't make any sense!

Digression Is Coherence, Kimosabe!

you both Dare to Insinuate that anything Can maKe senSe in this thread???

[AllenLowe]

walking on water wasn't built in a day

[aparxa]

Pot of the morning!

[Joe G]

This just in:

Slugs intercedes bender papillaary

[Chuck Nessa]

I knew it!!!!

[Van Basten II]

For those who have nothing to do, i have a great mission. Research and find out what the names that are the most employed in the 3 name game. Wish i could pay you, that be a great job.

[AllenLowe]

already know the answer -

Joe

Sue

Mike

that'll cost you 50 bucks -

[Free For All]

I don't get it. They're MF awful. Seem to be very popular around these parts. Anyone a fan?

[Aggie87]

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.

The winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3 . Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:

1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.

8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

9. Karmageddon (n): its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.

12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an ass.

[Free For All]

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

My favorite.

[Free For All]

In my day, a "snuggie" was a whooooole other thing.

Edited April 19, 2009 by Free For All

[Swinging Swede]

You have just successfully wasted your time reading this sentence.

[Aggie87]

Chevy Chase's real name is Cornelius.

[catesta]

In my day, a "snuggie" was a whooooole other thing.

hehe

We used to call it a "wedgie", I never heard the term "snuggie" until I went west.

Talk about a lost art. I don't think kids even do that kind of shit anymore. They probably just send "virtual snuggies" via text messages.

[Free For All]

Current most annoying commercial: Baskin Robbins' Ice Cream & Cake. Can't get to the mute button fast enough.