Very sorry to hear this! I know from own experience (a mother with serious mental health issues) how hard it is trying to help someone who’s struggling that way. i also know from experience that everybody will give ‘good advice’ from best intentions but that most of that advice is or not realistic or just not very helpful. And now I am going to do the same to you. So maybe it’s a little helpful and if not: just forget what I say.
To me it really sounds you already know what the big problem is. Menopauze is one thing but that’s not something you can control. But your wifes job IS something within your circle of control. It really sounds like the job is killing your wife mentally. And than youre going to reach a point that you have to ask yourself: should I really continue with this job that is making me so unhappy or should I quit and find something that will give me energy and strength again.
Now this comes from a guy who hasnt the slightest knowledge of your financial situation so forgive me if this just aint an opportunity. But if it is: i really think she should find another job, maybe something completely different. Those pills are just symptom suppression but the cause remains the same. Hope you will be careful with that kind of medication as I know from own experience (my mom again) that stuff is really unhealthy and risky.
Forgive me if I didnt read well but youre wife is not seeing a psychiatrist yet? That might be of help as well, though it of course depends on the person she will be seeing. Some of them are good, some are of no use.
Last but not least: you’re wife really needs time for herself. She has to find herself again in the better things of life. Picking up an old hobby is an idea, going for long walks in nature another and finally working out and eating healthy is essential. All these kind of things will not help instantly but do help a lot on the longer term and the absence of these things makes one unhappy and hard to relax.
Part from this, I just want to wish you and youre wife the best. I sincerely hope she will get the right self insight to change the factors in her life that make her unhappy.